F4tim3's Blog

Just the way I am…

Happy New Year 2013

cat nuyer

Here It comes…. New Year 2013…. happy New Year All….

Lets make a best wishes for all year come on 2013…may this year will be our beginning for all the kindness for the unkind… luck for the unlucky… and be more better for the good…

May God..will give us His blesses.. to make this year become our happiest year filled with joy, peace and love.



7 January 2013 Posted by | Home | 1 Comment

Things You Can Officially Stop Worrying About..

There are many areas in which I need encouragement, but worrying is not one of them. I worry about the future, a lot of things that I couldn’t see, who could anyway ? . You may be has similar thought, because worrying comes easily to a certain sub population of humans, namely those of us with pulses. We’re constantly creating new, worry-based strategies for living.

But worrying is worrisome: It’s stressful, and as we all know, stress will kill you. I worry about that a lot. that is why , sometimes its hard for me just to enjoy my life, So today I’m striking a tiny blow for sanity with my list of few things you can officially stop worrying amy source is from Oprah’book,

1. What’s on Your Plate

I’ve heard my friend said, “If I can just finish this project, “I can stop worrying. ” She’s said this every time, I’ve ever spoken to her. No matter how much work that she finishes, by the time it’s done she’s fixating on a whole new crop of chores. In our achievement-obsessed society, this is “normal.” But I realized just how insane it is when a friend was dying of cancer. On her deathbed she managed to joke with me, “Hey, at least I only have one more thing on my to-do list.”

Instead of fretting about getting everything done, why not simply accept that being alive means having things to do? Then drop into full engagement with whatever you’re doing, and let the worry go.

“But,” you may be thinking, “I can’t just cut my anxiety loose! It isn’t under my control!” I empathize with this argument. I also know it’s bunk. To stop worrying about something, simply direct your attention toward something else. Personally, I like to interrupt my flow of worry by imagining—vividly—what I’d do if an elk walked into the room. See? Distraction works.

2. Needing Help

I used to be one of those people who spurned assistance—from other people, from God, from chemicals. Not anymore! These days—whether I’m begging for divine intervention, enlisting a fellow coach to help me overcome my aversion to e-mail, or refilling the awesome prescription that helps me sleep no matter how disruptive my schedule—I pretty much walk around hollering, “Help wanted!”

Are my helpers crutches? You betcha. Mama needs crutches, and she doesn’t worry one little bit about using them. If you worry about needing what you need—a shoulder to cry on, a standing date with a shrink, whatever the shrink prescribes—come to Mama, and she’ll smack you upside the head with her crutches until that worry flies right out of your mind.

3. Your Children

There was a time when I spent many hours worrying about my kids. In fact, I was so worried my firstborn would feel unloved that I “soothed” her constantly, blasting the poor child with a fire hose of anxious energy. It’s a wonder she survived.

My second child, who arrived with an extra 21st chromosome, eventually led me to a shocking conclusion: We don’t actually have much control over the way our kids turn out. Genes do a lot of the deciding, and the owner of those genes does most of the rest. Some kids let parents have a great deal of influence; others don’t. Either way, people blossom when we love them, not when we worry about them. Worry just teaches worry. Let it go.

4. Your Face (and Hips, and Butt…)

As long as we’re on the subject of DNA, let’s take on the big kahuna of worries: our appearance. Ten bajillion product ads notwithstanding, your looks are another thing that’s basically genetic. Stressing about them only deepens the facial creases that make everyone in your family resemble perturbed bulldog puppies. Key phrase: everyone in your family.

Instead of obsessing over your own appearance, try noticing—and mentioning—beautiful things about everyone else. This will make people adore you, which, last time I checked, is what most of us are hoping to achieve by worrying about our looks in the first place.

5. What You Own

The trick here is learning to reframe your perspective. For example, my friend Kathy always lays a colorful towel over her expensive tablecloth before serving her twin 7-year-old granddaughters a snack. One of the twins recently said, “Grandma, you don’t need to worry about us spilling. Spills are just memories.” If you’d rather live surrounded by pristine objects than by the traces of happy memories, stay focused on tangible things. Otherwise, stop fixating on stuff you can touch and start caring about stuff that touches you.

6. Everything You’re Doing Wrong

I don’t know any perfect people, but I know many who worry about being perfect. They exercise religiously and serve their families home-cooked organic free-range Tofurky recipes. They are unbearable.

I love the Buddhist concept of enlightenment as living without anxiety over imperfection. You can strain every fiber of your being trying to be flawless, only to face inevitable failure—or you can stop worrying about perfection, which instantly makes everything feel great. Save time and tofu: Choose option two.

7. The Past

I agree that your divorce settlement was a travesty of justice on par with the sack of Troy, that your last boss was abusive, and that you shouldn’t have calmed yourself with so many appletinis prior to testifying before Congress. I do not agree that worrying about it now will do any good.

The word worry comes from the Old English wyrgan, meaning “to strangle.” When we fixate on something in the past, we grab our own histories by the throat, cutting off the flow of physical and emotional energy that keeps us fully alive. To start the flow again, look forward. Think how you can apply what you’ve learned. Let your divorce teach you to negotiate assertively, your horrible boss help you spot and avoid other creeps. Let the debacle at Congress send you to a 12-step meeting. Embracing the lesson always loosens the stranglehold of worry.

8. What People Are Saying About You Right This Very Second

People are always telling me elaborate stories about the elaborate stories other people are supposedly telling about them. “I know people mock my pain,” growls one client. “Everyone expects me to be strong,” says another. “You think I’m expendable,” sobs a wife, while her husband protests, “You think I’m a robot.” All of these people are wrong, but they’ve got company. We all worry what people think about us—until we decide not to waste the energy.

When I first started coaching, I noticed that I never worried what my clients thought of me. Why not? All my attention was focused on understanding them. I watched like a Martian observer, not a vulnerable peer. This took me out of worry mode, and it helped clients feel seen. By not worrying about what they thought of me, I accidentally ensured that they thought well of me.

Today, pretend you’re a Martian gathering data on humans. As you notice what they do and say without focusing on your fear of their opinions, you’ll feel less self-conscious, and they’ll feel the nonjudgmental attention they’ve always wanted from you. Win-win.

9. Your Account Balance

I have nothing against the globally sacred rite of worrying about money. Except this: People, it has no payoff.

I stopped worrying about money when I was unemployed, living on credit card debt. It wasn’t that my ship came in. It was just that I’d decided to try writing for a living, yet I was too worried to write. So I proactively pushed aside worry as I worked. Did I make money that day? No. Did I make money sooner because I stopped worrying? I think so. Did I enjoy my life more from that moment on, regardless of how much I had in the bank? Abso-freaking-lutely. Go about your business, whatever it is, with full energy. And drop the worry. Watch how much stronger your moneymaking skills become when you’re not dragging around a hefty load of anxiety.

10. Worrying

If your Spanx are now totally knotted from trying to stop worrying, it’s time to take a nice, cleansing breath. Aaahhhh. Remember point number six: We’re not after perfection here. If you’ve felt even a tiny release from worry while reading this list, you’re succeeding. That slight lessening of anxiety is all you need.

Wiggle your worries a little each day, and they’ll gradually lose their hold on you. Trust that you’re already counteracting the barrage of messages that tell us, every day, to worry, worry, and worry some more. Enjoy the liberating sense of bucking the cultural tide, I use this reminder as my own therapist… keep ensuring everything will just fine..and move forward….

Why don’t you try your self now… ? Good luck guys…

4 April 2012 Posted by | Home | Leave a comment

My Nunun..

You may be already knew about this fella, I’ve introduced it in my previous post…

Yes..her name is Nunun, she is my beautiful pet, her age is 11 years already.. and yesterday she closed her eyes forever.. leave me here to see her creator…

I miss her already..

Lately..until the day she was token,  I have not much time to share with her… and to be honest.. I feel so guilty of that.. really sorry nunun.. You’re are good friend of me..sorry for being not good friend for you… wish you rest in peace now…

Miss you always,


6 March 2012 Posted by | Home | Leave a comment


Its been long time since my last post..

2011 become such a busy year for me.. the year that I start work at the new company.. a lot of things to do and create.. that’s why.. I have no time to write here… sorry…

Reviewing year 2011 for me is … flat.. nothing much that I do for my hobbies and personal life… just work..work and work.. even so.. I still thanks to God for this opportunity that God gave me…

Time gone so fast…

Now is 2012 already.. here I am… my biggest expectation for this year is.. I can do a lot of things for my self, my family, my friends, my environment, and with my hobbies as well….

I know.. sometime, running our life is not as easy as we said and thought…but I still believe, No matter what will happen, God will help me anyway.. the only ONE who knows what best for me… who have the answer of everything….

so… Have a nice year to dear…..

6 March 2012 Posted by | Home | Leave a comment

Marhaban ya Ramadhan…

Tak terasa..Ramadhan pun siap datang menjelang… satu tahun sudah berlalu…. Selamat menunaikan ibadah puasa.. semoga Ramadhan memberikan berkah untuk kita semua… amiiin….

26 July 2011 Posted by | Home | 2 Comments

Just Today..

Dear God.. I will never thank enough for all the bless and gift that You gave me… and I will never forgiven enough for all the things that I’ve done… You still love me anyway… it is true.. That You are The One and Only… My Lord.. You are The Best..
I always need You more and more…..

29 June 2011 Posted by | Home | Leave a comment

Don’t be Sad…

... hiks..hiks…. I do hate to feel this way…. sad is the word that I always try to avoid…

Jangan Sedih yaa… sabar… hanya kata itu yang terucap ketika ada teman atau aku sendiri lagi merasa sedih… kenapa kita bisa sedih yah… gimana siy cara nya biar gak sedih…sedih itu baik atau buruk  siy ? ada gak ya di dunia ini orang yang gak pernah sedih…. ?

Sedih adalah ungkapan rasa yang dimiliki oleh manusia atas kekecewaan, sakit atau berada dalam situasi yang tidak menyenangkan, banyak cara orang mengekspresikan sedih yang mereka rasakan, ada yang menangis, ada yang diam, menarik diri dari pergaulan, ada yang teriak-teriak atau bahkan ada yang melampiaskan nya ke makanan, dengan cara makan secara berlebihan misal nya, atau dengan memilih jenis makanan tertentu untuk di konsumsi sebagai obat penghilang sedih, seperti coklat yang di percaya dapat memberikan rasa senang karena mengandung anti depression di dalam nya.

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5 October 2010 Posted by | About Me, Home, Just thought | 2 Comments